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hell is
the devil's chest,
an empty red cavern
he's simply trying
to fill
he's empty and
nothing will do
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WillSchenck Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2015
perfect. always impressed by haiku... you have a much less room to make an impact. you have handled the artform in a delicate and poignant way. :+fav:
Alienesque Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2015
Probably the best poem I have read on dA (first signed up 2007).
Quindayo Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2014  Student Digital Artist
So beautiful and true
Rai-Laurel Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2014
I like the imagery of this. If you've ever played Minecraft, and gone to the Nether in a completely flat world, that is the image this poem created in my mind: Eerie, empty, and very red.

You've made my heart beat a little slower. Nice.
Hydrogenuine Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
There are no words that can express exactly how perfect I find this piece.

Right down to the bloody non-existent title.

There's just no words.
pokeabubble Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2014
WOAH. I've never thought about it that way. I like this way of seeing it.
awildusernameappears Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Wow, you really have a way with words.
I know you've heard this a million times,
buy her me through, you are amazing.
I really can't express the level of
awe I feel. Your writing, it's...
otherworldly. Amazing.
oaklungs Featured By Owner Aug 10, 2014
this comment means so much to me, like you have no idea :huggle: thank you so much :thanks::heart:
sairey Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
You're amazing! :O
JeffreyRebowlski Featured By Owner May 25, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Beautiful in its simplicity. 
autumn-spirit Featured By Owner May 3, 2014
you're so clever and amazing :D
lucidsleepwalk Featured By Owner May 2, 2014  Student Writer
oh my god, this is so poignant in such few words
TheMidnightWhisp Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
(': I love this very much. It is quite sad and has a wicked twist to it that makes you have to think for a moment.

You, my friend, are a legend. 
DarthZeeK Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Really awesome. Reminds me of that personal inner void after being "Fallen." Great work!
ChinZaPep Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2014  Student Digital Artist
I really love this poem so I was inspired to make a palette out of it as a tribute!… Each line of your poem is the name of a color I used. I hope you enjoy! QuQ <3333
Sammur-amat Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014   General Artist
scintillating :heart: 
The-Lost-Hope Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2014  Student General Artist
This one is very powerful. Well said!
Eleh Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2014
left me breathless.
AwesomeTheAmazing Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Makes you feel sad for him... makes you want more people to go to hell... makes you feel okay when you tell people to go to hell... ;) 
Maybe not that far :D  But it really does put a new perspective on what hell is considered and who the devil is!  Great writing (as always:aww:)!
TheEmptyChest Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2014
Vivid and deep, and truthfully it makes me feel kind of sorry for the devil. Perpetual emptiness is a loathsome thing.  
dhxjcrd Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2014
IceColdNormal Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2014
i love this take :)
TheAstrologist Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2014
Very beautiful. :) I like it. :heart:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2014
TheAstrologist Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2014
babycell8 Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2014
hell there is total darkness no light at all

fire that cannot be seen

beast that have power to torment you like a scorpion

many other torments you'll see the times you were witnessed to of the Lord and you turn him down

you'll see the people of GOD in heaven at peace with GOD forever

and you may see some one you loved so dear in hell being tormented and they may see you and cry for you to help them

you won't be able to help

and the devil will be there and he will say to you "I have to come hear this place was made for me but you didn't have to come here if you have gotten saved but you didn't and now your here with me forever" and why would you want to go thru that? you don't have to because Jesus made a way to heaven thru his blood
TheMidnightWhisp Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
That is truly not the point here.
Cygnicantus Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
reminds me of some lines of a certain song...  ♥
A-s-h-l-y-n Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
oaklungs Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014
mmv303 Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2014
Great work!
Cocolena Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2014  Student Writer
This is amazing! 
NotenSMSK Featured By Owner Mar 9, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Quite nice - the feel of being a glutton comes to my mind - nothing will fill his hunger - although it is like an empty chest, it is still the devil - we can say his heart's thirst.
sherbetblooms Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
:heart: hearts are a lot like devils, sometimes. 
Morticia-Lynne Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2014  Student Writer
When I read this, I read 'chest' as the one for torso, giving a feel that he's depressed and his heart is a void.
Stunning and gorgeous work, I beleive this ranks third in my top favorites of your work from the sheer unique and relatability of this (not to mention thought-provoking nature)
bootsnchaps Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2014
He is full
And nothing of you

Heaven is
Gods chest,
A full white cloud
You will be in the cavern,
because your not allowed
AgnesKilljoy Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
simply amazing
oaklungs Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2014
thank you :blushes:
danimalGAME Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
this is true and beautiful and amazing
Nandra11 Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014
This is exceptional.
AcidLegacy Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014
i really just like everything you write ever. it's wonderful.
pardonM3 Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014
Oooh, I like this. Makes me think of a canyon or a desert, hot and dry and echoing red dust.
wei-en Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014
This has a really nice image.
BlackBowfin Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
So simple, so true.
IronButterfly4567 Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2014

well said!

parameciumkid Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2014  Student Digital Artist
I feel sorry for that poor guy :\
MixedSunlight Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
This is very interesting... and true, from a Christian perspective. Satan wants to drag as many of us down with him as possible. The sod... :saddummy:
BlackSheep6 Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
wow i didn't desperatelly need a genius poem with a brilliant concept to make me cry actual tears but thank you :heart:
You need therapy if you get hysterical over this, darling. Or perhaps surgery to remove your head from her arse. Seriously, it's nice that you like it, nice that you're a fan- I like this one poem too. But why on earth go so dramatic and zealous? CRINGE!!!!! 
BlackSheep6 Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
OOOOOH well thank you for your opinion I din't ask for. Just so you know, I don't need therapy. It's okay to love the shit out of things, be that poems or anything. It is also okay to express your feelings about things. You know, it actually MAKES PEOPLE HAPPY, both those who write it and those who recieve it so WHY ON EARTH would you go and say there's something wrong with me for making myself and others happy?! 
Please do continue cringing if that makes you happy just don't fucking rain on my parade for no good reason whatsoever, okay? Thanks. 
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February 24, 2014


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