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the cat keeps
leaving dead meat
on my doormat,
a pile of bones,
bloody and raw

he wants me to
know what i'm
walking into, he
wants me to know
just what i am
i'm dropping this one in as a deviation because the more i look at it the more i want to.
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:iconshriss:
Shriss Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah, cats are good like that.
Reply
:iconkeitone:
keitone Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
please don't take it off... its so beautiful!! :'( 
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:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2014
i'm not deleting it, it's grown on me ;)
thank you so much though! :heart:
Reply
:iconseilf:
Seilf Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Purrfect <3
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:iconmardoqueo:
Mardoqueo Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
WOW!
Reply
:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2013
:hug: thank you
Reply
:iconchewyraezen:
chewyraezen Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
what we are all reduced to, take away our skin, our many layered selves, we are reduced to bloody bits and bones. and we are all the same underneath. 
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:iconjohnashleigh:
JohnAshleigh Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2013   Writer
An awakening metaphor. A great approach! Thankyou for sharing. 

Regards, 
John.
Reply
:iconhellionscythe:
HellionScythe Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2013
Beautiful :heart:
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:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2013
thank you so much :blushes:
Reply
:iconhellionscythe:
HellionScythe Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2013
Your most welcome ^-^
I very much love how you use the words and create these....indescribable feelings with them. I wish I can use words like that lol Hope to see more of your work in the future :)
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:iconpereyga:
Pereyga Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Love the mtaphor you used here, this is some great poem
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:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2013
thank you very much! :heart:
Reply
:iconpereyga:
Pereyga Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
you're welcome :3
Reply
:iconhannahdaye123:
hannahdaye123 Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2013
i think im obsessed with you
Reply
:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2013
aww you're too sweet :bucktooth: :heart:
Reply
:iconi-am-a-bridgewalker:
i-am-a-bridgewalker Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
oh I really like this one. the brevity and sharpness of it. and that second stanza that reveals something about the psychological state of the speaker, and in doing so creates a whole hidden story.

(one suggestion would be to replace the comma in the second stanza with a period? I read it as two halting sentences, weighty and frightening as they are.)
Reply
:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2013
ah, now that you mentioned that i see what you mean, yes :hug:
Reply
:iconsilver-sung:
silver-sung Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I really like this one; it gets you thinking about the meaning behind it, since it isn't totally spelled out for the reader.
Reply
:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2013
oh i'm glad you like it :bucktooth: :heart:
Reply
:iconpseudolution:
Pseudolution Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2013
What I am, is a sucky line. What's out there. What's in her. What's blah blah. Would work better.
Reply
:iconanila73:
anila73 Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
well thank you for submitting it because i love it.
Reply
:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2013
:tighthug:
Reply
:iconinsomniaplague:
insomniaplague Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I have to say, I just love your use of normal things as these brilliant metaphors. They're the clever kinds I think we all wish we could think of. :heart:
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:iconhaphazardmelody:
haphazardmelody Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Yes!
Reply
:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2013
aw i don't know what to say :blushes:
i never know what to say when people say lovely kind things
thank you :thanks::heart:
Reply
:iconhaphazardmelody:
haphazardmelody Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I just have to tell you that I absolutely and completely agree. I was going to leave a comment of my own, but that one sums up what I had to say completely.
Reply
:iconinsomniaplague:
insomniaplague Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Ah, you don't have to say anything. :) (After all, I'm only said that because I think you should know! ^^)
Reply
:iconssensory:
ssensory Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2013   Writer
this x111000023838473423434
Reply
:iconinsomniaplague:
insomniaplague Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I agree with this statement.
Reply
:iconssensory:
ssensory Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2013   Writer
:nod: 
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